Talk - Listen - Choose

TLC is a conflict resolution program that is near and dear the hearts of many at Sherwood School. Nine years ago teachers and students at Sherwood School saw a need. They responded by designing and producing this program.  It includes many interactive teacher/ student activities, a song written by Glen MacEachern, former teacher at Sherwood (which you hear a portion of) and two videos. The program is available to all elementary schools in Prince Edward Island and we are very proud of it.

Last year we had several assemblies that centered around TLC and this year we plan to keep a year long focus on TLC (Talk- Listen-Choose). Be sure to ask your children about this program. If you would like to look at the program in more detail, drop into the school.

TLC (Talk, Listen, Choose) Program

Introduction/ History

The program TLC (Talk, Listen, Choose) came about in an effort to help children deal independently with problems. As teachers, instructing our students in literacy and mathematical skills is an integral part of our programs. We expect that students will use these skills to gather information, to make inferences and draw conclusions, to solve problems and to apply their skills in new situations. In the same way students need to learn personal skills to cope with strong emotions like anger and fear and love. They need to understand and accept themselves and to develop a tolerance and respect for the feelings of others. When children have the tools to recognize and deal with challenges in their relationships with others, they have been empowered as individuals and as groups to take control in a positive manner.

As teachers, we want our students to have a pleasant school environment where they can grow to their fullest potential. We sometimes do see children involved in hurtful situations in the classroom, in the playground and on the bus. It is not difficult for these situations to become entrenched and escalate into patterns of destructive behaviour involving individuals or groups of students. The program we developed grew out of a growing awareness that conflict was interfering with other processes. Our goal was to establish for our school a common student-centered process for resolving conflict and to help students become aware that they have the ability to deal with challenging situations. These tools then could also be used to deal positively with difficulties faced in family and community situations.

We began by surveying parents, students and teachers to determine their ideas on the types of problems which needed resolving. For our first video, we chose to deal with the problem of exclusion because being left out seemed to be a recurring problem and one which individuals found both hurtful and hard to deal with. The dynamics of exclusion often involved the use of communication blockers like name calling or blaming which stood as barriers to resolving the issues.

The acronym TLC (tender loving care) is part of our everyday speech. It is the way that we want to treat anything or anyone precious to us. In times of stress, we speak of needing a little extra TLC. We wanted to build on this idea of reaching out to those around us when we gave students tools to mend and strengthen relationships. In our program, TLC, the letters stand for talking, listening and co-operative choosing because the best way of meeting challenges in any life situation involves dialogue and shared solutions for which both sides are prepared to take ownership.

In TLC, both parties share in the process. It is the responsibility of the person being hurt to be assertive and to take the initiative in starting the process of resolution. Talking involves making eye contact with the other person or persons. It involves make I statements which express how the person is feeling without blaming the other. Listening means really listening. It means looking at the other person and acknowledging their feelings. Choosing means coming up with a mutually agreed on solution.